Birth story...
So I've been wanting to write my birth story for a while now. I'm actually
pretty sad that I didn't do it sooner since I'm sure there are a few things I
forgot already.
It all started the day of induction. Yes, unfortunately I had to be induced.
Let me just say that almost everything I wanted for my birth plan did not go as
planned. I'm not going to say that it was a horrible experience because the end
result was so amazing, but it was far from ideal. If, let me say that again,
IF
we ever have any more children, there are soooooooo many things I will do
differently. But that would be a totally different blog to write about, if we
ever cross that bridge.
The beautiful day was January 2nd, 2012 (1-2-12). The night before, Brad and
I went out for a delicious dinner and dessert for a last meal as a family of
two. We didn't really feel any anxiety. We were more than ready. I had to go to
the hospital a few days before with PAINFUL contractions. Approximately 6 hours
later, they realized it was false labor and sent us home. Needless to say, we
were ready for the twincesses to arrive.
I had everything packed, slept comfortably and took a hot shower that
morning. We got our things, kissed our fur babies goodbye (I was sad that I was
not going to see them for a few days) and left for the hospital. I remember how
excited we were on the car ride there. Even though it was so early, we were so
eager to meet the girls.
Because my pregnancy was considered high risk, I didn't feel like I had much
control of how things could go down. Having a natural, home-birth was out of
the question...too risky for us! My main concern was being able to give birth
vaginally. Out of everything else, that was something I didn't want to change.
I knew that I had to mentally prepare myself otherwise, but never really
thought it could happen. When a woman is expecting twins and decides to give
birth vaginally, she needs to understand that an emergency c-section may happen
with baby B, if it decides to move at the last minute and become breeched. I
was totally okay with that. It was something that both, Brad and I, wanted to
experience. So if Isa had to come out via cesarean, we were ready for that.
However, my entire family did not agree.
We got to the hospital at 7am and got admitted right away. When they checked
me, I was still 2cm dilated. They started me on Pitocin around 10am and the
contractions slowly became closer together and more painful. We waited, and
waited and waited for things to slowly progress. Seriously, we hated waiting.
At first, I was starving but then the IV kicked in and I felt fine. Brad, on
the other hand, decided that if I wasn't eating anything, he wasn't going to
either. My poor hubby did not eat a single thing the entire time. I guess he
wanted to experience that with me. That was one of the few things he had
control over.
A few hours later, the doctor came in to check on me. Since things were
progressing slowly, she decided to break my water. Wow, what a weird feeling
that was! The funny part was, that fluids kept coming out for a while, like an uncontrollable
pee lol. When she broke my water, Brad was right there watching. He said that
it was the worse smell ever!!!! Even worse than the smell of dead people. Hey,
not my fault he wanted to be that involved lol. Let me just say that after
that, the contractions starting getting closer together and freaking painful.
Up to this point, things were going pretty well. The babies were still head
down, ready to make an entrance into the world. The doctor was so excited to be
able to deliver twins vaginally. Everything changed when....................I
got an EPIDURAL!
I was a bit hesitant to get it when I was only 4cm dilated. The nurse,
somehow, convinced me that getting sooner was better. So I did, out of fear
that waiting too long could potentially deprive me from it. Luckily, Brad was
able to be in the room and hold my hand while I was getting it. I also had to
get a catheter, which was great because I didn't have to get up every 10 mins
to go to the bathroom. The epidural felt amazing. The pain was gone. Ahhh, I
could finally relax and enjoy everyone's company. Until..........the ITCHING
started. WTF, why didn't anyone warn me about this side-effect???? I don't know
how to describe how I was feeling. It felt like thousands, no millions, of ants
were crawling and biting me all over my upper body. I was BEGGING everyone to
scratch me. After a while, my family was refusing to help me because my skin
was red from all the scratching. The nurse offered to give me Benadryl to
relieve the itching, but it would make me drowsy; I declined. I was already
feeling tired and didn't want to be completely exhausted during birth. Things
started getting really aggravating when I stopped dilating. The doctor checked
me and I was at 4.5 cm.
One hour goes by......Two hours go by.......I was still itching!!!! Ok
someone please take me to a mental institution..............I felt like I was
losing my mind and nobody was willing to
help scratch me. I gave in and
took the damn Benadryl. So at this point, I'm completely out of it and STILL
4.5 cm dilated. Ugh, so frustrating! It was obvious that my body was not
cooperating. Juliana's heart rate started to drop. The doctor said there was
nothing else for us to do and for the health of the twins I would have to get a
c-section. My world came crashing down. I would have to wait another hour for
the OR to be ready and she would check me one more time before going in. I
couldn't help but cry. This is NOT what I wanted. Why was my body not doing
what it was meant to do? I knew that I should have waited on the epidural. I
couldn't get up and walk around. There was nothing I could do to make my body
progress. After that, I didn't want anyone else in the room but Brad. He was my
rock. He was right next to me trying to make me feel better about the
situation. I wanted everyone to be quiet and let me "relax." I was so
exhausted and wanted the girls to come out so bad.
Then finally the time came. The OR was cold and I was really nervous about the
surgery. They gave me some other medicine, which made me shake uncontrollably.
Not like a little shake, but more like, I'm having a seizure kind of shake.
Then the feeling of vomit started. Since there was nothing in my stomach, I
started to dry heave. I also had to get oxygen. I remember that at one point, I
couldn't breathe. When Juliana first arrived, it took her a few seconds to cry.
Ohhhh God, that was the most beautiful sound. I could hear my baby girl
crying!!! They quickly showed her to me before whisking her away to check her.
Oh yeah, did I mention the room was full of doctors and nurses??? Two minutes
later Isabella arrived. She literary came out crying. Not only that, she was
grabbing the doctor's tools. How funny is that? My little active girl was
already showing her personality. I saw her for few seconds too. Brad went to be
with the girls that were in the same room, but on the other side.
I could hear the doctor and nurses talking about something. I knew that
something wasn't right. Later I found out that my placenta had attached itself
too deeply into the wall of the uterus. This happens about 1 in 2,500
pregnancies and I was the lucky one. Ultrasounds usually can detect this, but
in my case they couldn't because I was carrying two. So I had to get stitches
in my uterus. Having a c-section was a blessing in disguise.
Juliana Carolina. Born at 7:03pm 5 lbs 3 oz 17.75 inches long
Isabella Marie. Born at 7:05pm 4 lbs 15 oz 18 inches long
When Brad came over with the girls, I could not open my eyes. I was so out
of it that I physically could not make myself open my eyes. He kept saying to
look at the girls, and I wanted to so bad, but I couldn't.
When we got to the recovery room, I told the nurse that I didn't want anyone
to come in. I wanted to enjoy this moment just the four of us. This nurse allowed
me to bond with my twins. For that, I will forever be thankful. Since I didn't
get to experience vaginal birth, I at least got to experience that one-on-one
skin contact with them. You can't tell in the picture, but I was still shaking
pretty bad. I was scared to hurt the babies. Having them finally in my arms was
the best feeling in the entire world. I had two beautiful, healthy girls. They
were absolutely perfect.
The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” - Rajneesh
Our first family picture. I know I look hideous, but I love the simplicity and natural look of it. We were finally parents. I loved that we got to enjoy this alone. Our lives were forever changed on that day.
Brad was so happy and proud of becoming a dad. Already a pro at holding both of his little girls =)
